The Smouldering Puzuma

The Smouldering Puzuma is an overground movement that has been investigating the conspiracy theory that a secret elite military force has been set up by the great powers of the Discworld. The organisation was set up many years ago when one of its founders rescued an injured Pointless Albatross and Accidentally  read a message attached to the bird's leg.

While the bird recovered the message never reached the addressee, Lord Fang, due to his barbarian problem. Since this time other intercepted birds and more recently clacks had suggested that while this force may have existed it was most definitely defunct _ until a few weeks ago when the following draft was recovered from the Patricians Palace.


Rufus -

                 send the following to all the leaders on the Disc; add the usual embellishments


The Palace.             

My Lords, Majesties, Excellences, Whatever,

You will recollect that back in the catastrophic year of 1964, the Red Sun episode, the Agatean Emperor orchestrated treaties to be sanctioned by the many diverse Kingdoms of the Discworld, the upshot being that if such a need arose an alliance would be formed of our crack (CK not P Drumnott) troops to combat any off-world threat.

Many peaceful years have passed and this treaty has been allowed to fall into disuse by my predecessors, yourselves and Lord Fangs unfortunate removal from power. Having rediscovered Ankh-Morporks copy of the treaty (buried at the bottom of a cess-pit, near Rham Nitz, 500 miles north of the city) it is noted that the inspection and training of this force was to be circulated amongst our Nations leaders. As Patrician of this wonderful twin city I also note that I am required to carry out this function from Sektober next and for the subsequent 3 years to safeguard its continual readiness.

While Krull technology has not progressed sufficiently to provide a viable Potent Voyager allowing us to explore the heavens this does not mean that other worlds will also have be so languid.

I have spoken to Lord Fangs successor, Ghenghiz Cohen who has entrusted me to revive this treaty and bring it back to full complement, enforcing the full penalties for none co-operation as detailed in its stipulations.

Consequently I intend to re-establish this force and command you as signatories of this treaty to provide me with details of your nominated elite troop by Octeday 13 Grune. I intend to  hold a training session for this force on the 22nd Grune and in deference to the fact that this is also Uberwald League of Temperance Day I expect all past, present and future differences of our noble Countries to be put on hold  and "Not One Drop" to be spilt.

Details of your contingency should be sent to my Chief Clerk, Rufus Drumnott at the above address within the month. Providing the training day is successful all penalties, sequestrations and executions for historical deficiencies in honouring this treaty will be renounced.

You will be interested to know that Lord Cohen has already offered his most experienced unit; he says they are small in number but between them they have nearly 1000 years of actual combat experience.

Yours etc .
Lord Havelock Vetinari
Patrician of Ankh-Morpork.

Lord Rust will expect to be the General in Charge -  Offer him the Battle Standard; tell him its a very important position as all the troops will be looking to see where he is and providing him with support ;  after all no-one wants the disgrace of losing their flag; whereas the General will be expected to be in the thick of the fighting all the time ; you might also add as an afterthought that many of the troops will be coming from much poorer areas than Ankh-Morpork and the General will be expected to feed, clothe and arm them


There were replies to this letter.




We apologise for the lack of updates for the past Five years but access to this site and its attached email account had been blocked without warning and for no apparent reason by the previous server owner.

Following their takeover by the email has suddenly started to work again (although we can only view the last 1000 mails - all SPAM) and we can now access this web site.

A lot has change in the past years; a major update had just been started to update the photos as many are of poor quality but was not completed, and we have digressed more towards the Armies of Discworld rather than individual figures.

If this not a fluke and we are allowed continuous access we will revamp the whole site and start again. The above is the start of this.

JAK April 2015

We still don't belieive that access will remain and that the new server owner won't block us again so we will be leaving the original site (below) until we have sufficient new content.

If no updates appear after two months you must assume that  have followed the previous owners lead and done the dirty and we have been disconnected again.

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The Legal Bit - Acknowledgements, Apologises and Disclaimers (as required (quite strongly by one) of the many companies who use the web)

Special thanks to :-

  • Terry Pratchett, for writing the books in the first place.
  • Bernard Pearson, a great influence on making all things Discworldly.
  • Paul Kidby for giving permission for the use of his designs on some of my own figures.
  • Daniel Knight for allowing the use of ideas and designs from his Troll Bridge film.
  • Sally Couch, former MD of Clarecraft for giving permission for the use of their images on these pages. Unfortunately Clarecraft is no longer in business.

This site is intended to be an enjoyable resource for all. It is entirely free and all pictures and content, unless otherwise stated, are owned and protected under the copyright laws by me. Materials on this web site shall not be duplicated without written consent of the author.

During the period I have been modelling I have looked at the official Kidby and Kirby pictures, Clarecrafts figures both large and small, as well as reading the Discworld books themselves to combine all available information together to create what I consider to be as near accurate characters as I can. I have also recorded notes, quotations and extracts from other web sites. It is possible that in my design notes there may be direct copies of other people's work. My apologies if this is so.

I have no connection with any of the businesses mentioned in these pages and the website is completely unofficial and is not endorsed by any of them. It is not my intention to infringe on any copyright or trademark (Warhammer, Citadel, Games Workshop, Golden Demon, Leman Russ and Mordheim are trademarks of GamesWorkshop Limited) which may have been used without the owner's permission. No challenge to their status is intended.

If anyone feels that I have infringed on his or her work let me know and I will check my source and correct as necessary.

My only contacts with any of the people or companies mentioned - other than as a customer of their products is:-

  • I have met Terry and Bernard and their comments have been helpful in interpretating the books and their products.
  • I have met Trish Baker, Sally and Andy, and Elton Murphy of Clarecraft in the final year or so it was in business and shown them some of my figures. It was one of Elton's comments that led to the full series of Angua figures which in turn influenced one of the last Clarecraft figures issued - DW166 Angua Mid Change.
  • As a past Golden Demon winner I have visited the Games Workshop Design Studio. I also support as many of the events held at my local Games Workshop store as possible, and have painted figures for their display cabinet.

Comments, suggestions etc. welcome to JAK at ufoat(REMOVE) delete (REMOVE) add ufo@ tbefore using email


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